The 12 Secrets To Being Happy Without Terms And Conditions

There have been thousands of essays, books and speeches on happiness and the secret to achieving it. Plato said the ultimate goal of man is happiness. And we do find ourselves desperately running after it, seeking it anywhere and everywhere – from the worn-out office chair and boardroom meetings to those Friday nights of unrestrained drinking, from the yoga getaways of Rishikesh to the neon party lights of Goa, from that extra slice of cake to those last painful push-ups. What is the secret to a perfect life? How do some people manage it so smoothly? © Pexels It never ends – this cycle of waiting for life to get better to be happy. I'll be happy when I get a girlfriend. I'll be happy if I get that dream job. We put so many long-term clauses on our happiness that it's no surprise it evades us. When you tell your mind that you can't be happy unless you get something, you are telling yourself you are unhappy in your present condition. The more you think about not having that something, the unhappier you get. When you tell yourself you hate something, the mind automatically keeps working to maintain that hate. If you tell yourself you hate your morning workout, the mind will keep you awake at night and not let you wake up on time in the morning, thus making you miss the gym session. Don't blame the mind – it's just helping you get what you asked it to. © Pexels Happiness need not be dependent on success, and success need not guarantee happiness. So how do you gain control over your life then? How do you achieve that constant state of general bliss, where you are ready to take on anything that life throws at you? So how do you train your mind into making your life actually better? You do these: 1. Get up early. This is the simplest and most clichéd advice you'd hear in your lifetime, but it's also the most underrated. For someone who has never been a morning person and needs her 8 hours of sleep, I know the pain of waking up early is an actual physical one. If you can't wake up early, start by telling yourself you love waking up early and you hate sleeping in late. Before you go to sleep, remind yourself of all the wonderful things you can do early in the morning. Your brain will gradually do what you think you love to do – which is waking up early. You'd be surprised by the amount of work you'll get done in the early morning hours, and you'd never want to go back to the old routine ever. 2. Sit on your bed for 5 minutes and tell yourself the 5 things you look forward to doing today. I'm going to take my dog for a walk today and we'll enjoy the warm winter sun together. I'm gonna do 5 extra reps at the gym today. Instead of telling yourself you're dreading that meeting at office, tell yourself that despite the dread you are excited to hear what your colleagues will present at the meeting. Don't tell yourself you hate getting up, you hate going to office, you hate taking a bath, even if you do. Tell yourself it's a lovely day, and it's going to be fantastic. When you tell yourself you hate something, you hate it even more. When you tell yourself you don't hate it, your mind gradually makes you like it and the task becomes easy. © Thinkstock/Getty Images 3. Exercise. Stretch. Go to the gym. Swim. Dance. Cycle. Train. Choose one activity of your liking and do it every day till you get bored of it. Even if you are not losing weight, keep doing it to keep yourself fit enough to function. A fit body gives you confidence and boosts your mood. A happy mind can make miracles happen. 4. Take time out to eat your meals in peace. Savour each morsel of your food. Avoid eating with people you don't like. Make mealtimes a pleasant activity. Have lunch with your favourite people. Have breakfast with your newspaper. Have dinner with your loved one. Focus on the food on your table and thank the universe for it. 5. Find excuses to laugh. Find something to laugh heartily at least once in the day. Think of the good things in life and smile. Smile, even if you are not feeling it. Gradually, you will learn how to feel it. Fake it till you make it. When you smile even when you are not happy, the brain gets confused and eventually starts believing you really are happy. Read a joke off the internet, share a meme, send a WhatsApp joke to a friend and share a laugh together. If there's no one, tell the joke to the stranger sitting next to you in the metro train. You'd be surprised at how eager the world is to find a reason to smile. © Thinkstock/Getty Images 6. Do one thing every day only for yourself, something that gives you happiness. It could be reading a particular book, playing the guitar, starting a new language, cooking something you like. Even if you do it for 15 minutes, do it. 7. Eat fruit every day. Tell yourself you want to eat that apple, even if you hate it. Finish it and pat yourself on the back for having made a healthy choice. Ten years down the line, your body will thank you for it and so will your mind. 8. Go for walks in your city. Pick up a book and go someplace outdoors where you can read in the winter sun. Explore your city on foot. Stop by tea stalls alone and pick conversations with random strangers over chai/ filter coffee. Compile your favourite music sounds in a playlist and listen to it on loop. 9. Make your bed. Once a week, wipe away all the dust and spread fresh sheets. Keep your favourite books where you can see them. Do the same with old grudges. 10. Plan a date that doesn't involve chugging shots or a fancy dinner. Go out in the winter sun and organize a day picnic. Take your favourite book, a sheet, chilled beer and some finger sandwiches. If there's no one else to come with you, do it alone. You'd be surprised how much time you have in the day. © Thinkstock/Getty Images 11. Be grateful. Say thanks for the things you have. For the warm food on your table, for the warm bed you sleep in, for the wonderful family you have, for the job that challenges you ever day. 12. Set apart a small amount as travel fund each day. Even if you don't have any immediate plans, making them anyway is reason enough to be happy. Planning for things you like gives you instant happiness and immense hope. It's a way of showing yourself a light at the end of a tunnel. Happiness is no rocket science. Rocket science is easier. The secret to happiness is so simple, obvious and out there, we often miss it. We dismiss it as clichéd and preachy, and lose faith easily. But if there's one thing that happiness relies on, it's faith. If you have to keep one thing, choose faith and keep at it. Do one simple thing every day and by the end of the month, you'd have achieved a much bigger thing. By the end of a lifetime, you'd have led a happy life.